Questions, always questions…

Thoughts before the workday begins.
I suppose we all want to accomplish something that has an impact, that touches people, that can be our legacy.
But, if you don’t have a family to provide a legacy for, what does it matter?
If what you do touches only a few people, then what’s the point in continuing?
If your job is done well enough, you can walk away and the next person will come in and make it their own, just like you did for the one you replaced, and all that time and work fades away –  so, then what?
Or, all you do can be so self-focused, all about making you feel better, being a “bigger” person, wiser, richer, successful, not for anyone now or in the future other than yourself. What does that mean once you’re dead?
It’s questions like these that I have to examine to be who I am, to do what I do. And, sometimes the answers mean about as much as the questions, which sometimes is very little. But I ask them anyway because I am who God created me to be.
Yes, questions like these can seem harsh to me. But they make me think. About the why in the things that occupy my life. In the people that I care about, wanting to do no harm, but only good. To do things in a way that represents the best I can do, whether someone else can do them better or not, because doing my best is worth enough. To be able to recognize a job well done, done better than I could, with honest admiration. To humbly accept success as a gift I’ve been given. A gift to use what I have to draw things together toward completion, even if it is the tiniest thing expected of me. 
To understand that not everyone thinks the way I do. That’s proven itself over time in both good ways, and painful ways. It is what it is. There is a reason that none of us are carbon copies, and we must strive to accept who we are, accept that what we do, as believers, is focused on pleasing One, not ourselves.
Not that we don’t take pleasure in the way things work out for good. We do. We should. We should also recognize the overwhelming number of people who act in ways we just can’t understand and might even admit we don’t approve of.  Maybe there is a purpose for us to find in moving them toward change, being careful to see through the eyes of Jesus and not judgmental human eyes. Knowing, that some people are perfectly happy with their lives and to them, we would seem to be intruding if we stick our noses into something we don’t understand.
And often, we don’t. As humans, many times we think we can read people far better than we can. If I were a betting person, I’d bet we all have dealt with the repercussions of people being sure they know us, and in saying or doing something have wounded us deeply. We’d also have to admit that we have been on the other end of that because we often believe we see more clearly than we do. Those cases are examples of how the power of forgiveness and repentance revive us. If we let it.
No one said this life was going to be easy. Especially as a believer. So many things to weigh. So much at stake, not only for us but for those in our lives we are given contact with.
And so, on occasion, the mind moves toward the difficult questions as I look at myself. If I let myself, I would come to the conclusion that I am an ultimate failure in just about every area of my life.
BUT, the good news is – the Good News! In 1979 I became a new creature, and I can look at the worst-case scenarios and know that God has a fix for them all. I can look back at a life that has many hills and valleys and know that I was not alone in any of them and that my road has a destination, and asking myself questions helps me stay focused.
Ultimately, if all things don’t lead to Him, to being able to go home someday, then what kind of impact or legacy, will I have that is worth anything eternally?
Yes, I fully understand that my questions are not necessarily your questions. But whatever your questions, God has the answers.
So, however you deal with your questions, I rejoice. In my weakness, His power is made perfect, and if the Old Testament warriors sent worshipers out ahead in battle, you can be assured praise happens with each set of questions.

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